Learning the Sussex dialect with Tim Cladpole (4)
Jul 25th, 2009 by Andy Funnell
This text was added to the later editions of “Jan Cladpole’s Jurney to ‘Merricur”. Once again, it bears witness to conditions of life in the rural Sussex society before 1850 and notably to a certain freedom of expression to be found elsewhere, in religion, for example.
TIM CLADPOLE’S ADVICE
Or no Grumblen.
I’ll tell ye a story, wot ev’ry one knows,
Dat man’s sich a commical cretur,
However much bigger he gets dan he’s clothes,
He’s still a desire to be greater.
He is sich a mutteren grumblen elf,
An meets wud abundance ov trouble,
Thinks nobuddy is so bad off as hisself,
Dis maakes he’s calamities double.
De thresher dat thumps in de dusty ol’ flour,
Is lapsey, an woll not work faster,
Goo ax un de reason, he does not do more,
“Why ’cause he dont live like he’s master!”
He’s master de farmer too grumbles an says,
“My landlord dat scamp ov a squire,
“Wile I have to struggel thro’ many ruff ways,
“He daily grows richer an higher !”
De squire wile he follows de fox in full cry,
Lord Lumpy he envys, and growls,
“Dat greasey ol’ chap’s better mounted dan I,
“Dats awves de lot of sich fools !
Lord Lumpy bears all things (except a rebuke)
Yet it puzzels he’s empty ol’ pate,
Per he cannot conceive why he’s not made a
As much lesser Lords have ov late.
De Duke has been fighten in France and in Spain,
Ah nun is so valiant as he,
He says he’s been shot at again an again,
An surly a Prince aught to be !
He’s Highness in secret keeps grumblen too,
” Dere’s nun so unhappy as I,
” De King has been sinken dis twelmont or two,
“ I cannot think why he dont die !”
De King has been wearen he’s life out to try,
With many a politic plan,
To govern an Empire an prythee fer why ?
‘Cause an Emp’ror’s a happyer man.
De Emperor envy’s de Pope, while de strings
Ov he’s hart are quite bursten wud woe,
He mourns dat he gets but de hommage of Kings,
Wile de Pope makes um kiss he’s gurt toe !
Thus all de whole kit ov us, grumble aloud,
Frum bottom to top ov de nation,
An I cannot help thinken ’tis ’cause we le proud,
Or else we shud rest in our station.
Fer Kings Lords and Squyers wud honors un gold,
Hav troubles much greater dan we ;
So grumble no more den fer wot I hav told,
Shud maak us contented to be !
Finis
As far as I know, this document is in the public domain.
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